Wednesday 11 February 2009

RAMBLE ON

I'M sick of the Liverpool drama right now. There's plenty I could say about the last-gasp win at Portsmouth, but I'll leave it - mainly because I'd be going over the same old points yet again.

Reds-wise, I will say this - and it's about my dream weekend. A weekend when Rafa:

a) Tells the media the team news and nothing more at the Friday press conference
b) Picks the strongest team on Saturday

Then hopefully...

c) We'll win convincingly and the only thing left to talk about will be the footie!

Oh and...

d) Andrei Voronin. He didn't pull up trees at Anfield, in fact, he was piss poor many times. But he is still a Liverpool player. And I can't help thinking he'd offer more than David Ngog. Voronin scored on Friday for Hertha Berlin. Check his goal out here

So to other things that bug me.

Top of the list:

PHONE-INS

Seriously, who are these people? I've heard some amazing views on football in my time - not least that Liverpool should sign Matt Le Tissier and Dennis Wise (seriously).

But they are ALWAYS topped by the people allowed to air their views on national radio and TV. My first question is, why? Why would you want to ring a phone-in? What is the point?

See me, I go the pub and get it out my system there. Or phone someone up. Or write my blog. But phone a radio or TV station? Never.

You may ask 'Well, why do you listen to them (or watch them)?'. Well, it's like a car crash. You don't want to look, but you know it's happened, so you have to.

Make your own mind up - this was a genuine call on tonight's You're On Sky Sports - a phone-in show on Sky presented by Gary Newbon pictured (absolute spit of Harold Bishop).


The 'expert' was former Liverpool and Everton player Don Hutchinson. Now if they'd been looking for an expert in covering your meat and two veg with a beer bottle, I could understand him being there. But an expert on footie? Nah. Anyway, the call went as follows:

CALLER: I don't know what all the fuss about Rafa Benitez is, people need to get off his back, you know, we're in our best position for years, people need to lay off.

DON HUTCHINSON: But surely if Rafa had been more positive with his team selections, Liverpool could be five or six points clear right now?

CALLER: Absolutely, if Rafa had been more positive with his team selections, we could be more than six or seven points clear.

DON: So what's your point mate?

CALLER: Well people need to get off his back, they don't know what goes on at the club.

No need for a punchline...

Next...

MANAGERS THAT DON'T LOOK LIKE THEY PLAYED FOOTIE

This came about today while working on a story about Fabio Capello.

It turns out the England manager, who tonight gave David Beckham the chance to win his 108th cap, also effectively ended Bobby Moore's international career.

That's because Capello scored the winner for Italy at Wembley in Moore's 108th game for England - a game when, according to reports, the West Ham legend looked a long way past his best and was, in fact, skinned in the lead up to Capello's strike - the only goal of the game.

The picture we had looked surreal - like someone had been at work with Photoshop. Somehow it didn't seem right, Capello is a boss, not a player!

This is not the picture I had, but I think it illustrates the point -
he doesn't look comfortable does he?

He looks much more at home clocking totty (fit girls, not the midfield playmaker) in the director's box when he's supposed to be watching a match!

So this got me thinking. The explanation is obviously a generation thing - I'm too young to remember Capello the player. For instance, thinking of Paul Ince as a player isn't weird - I watched him at Anfield enough times.


Equally, I can remember Gianfranco Zola, Steve Bruce, Mark Hughes, Gareth Southgate and Gary Megson playing.

Others - just can't picture it. It's an interesting phenomena, and we've had a couple ourselves, of course.


Could you imagine crashing into a 50-50 tackle with Gerrard Houllier? Or contesting a cross with Rafa Benitez?

Outside of Anfield, would you of fancied your chances marking Arsene Wenger, Tony Pulis or Tony Mowbray (pictured)? All played - and all were defenders.

So too was David Moyes - described as a 'journeyman centre half'. Alex Ferguson was, by all accounts, a quite decent striker and Martin O'Neill was a European Cup-winning midfielder.

Fulham boss Roy Hodgson was crap though. He was at Crystal Palace where he never broke into the first team before playing for non-league sides Tonbridge, Gravesend & Northfleet and Maidstone.

So what are they all like now? Be a laugh to see. How about a North v South game of Premier League six-a-side to settle it?

Line ups could be:

NORTH: Bruce, Hughes, Southgate, Allardyce, Pulis, Sbragia.
SOUTH: Wenger, Zola, Redknapp, O,Neill, Mowbray, Hodgson.

I'd pay to watch that - probably be more entertaining than some of the predicatable drivel served up by the first teams these days!

The big question is - if there was a foul, would Wenger see it?!

1 comment:

Dave Molyneux said...

You know what I hate about phone ins?, when the presenter plays devil’s advocate when somehone has a perfectly legitimate point. Example:

Caller: just ringing up to say how good we were today (say for instance his team have just tonked someone 17-0)

Presenter: yeah mate, but don’t you think you’ll struggle for the rest of the season? The board are in disarray. The manger is about to be sacked.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhhh !!!!

Fucking gets on my nerves

You know what else gets on my nerves about phone ins?, birds ringing up!!!

Bird caller: “hello Spoony, just been to Hartlepool away and the women’s toilets are an absolute disgrace and most of the men sitting by me had terrible body odour (Ocean) and the Bovril was far too hot to drink and it spilled down the front of my nice new blouse, etc, etc, etc ……….

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh!!! FUCKING DON’T GO THE FUCKING MATCH THEN IF YOUR GONNA MOAN YOUR TITS OFF ALL GAME THEN YOU STUPID FUCKING BINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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